Living With Mental Health Problems♡

Todays post may be a bit heavy, but it is something that isn't spoke about very often - mental health.

 

Did you know that 1 in 4 people will suffer from some form of mental health issue at some point in their life?!

So why is it something that isn't spoken about very often? It seems because you can't see it, it doesn't exist.

Well it does! It could be that quiet girl you walk past every day, or that one guy that tries too hard to be accepted, everyone handles it differently, but I know one thing, most people with mental health problems will hide the fact they are suffering, because it is seen as being weak.

 

Guess what?! I'm taking a stand, and I am being brave, and admitting to the world, that I, suffer from mental health problems!

 

I was diagnosed with depression when I was only 16, because my mum kicked me out and I had to leave my life behind and start afresh, in a new town, with a new family (I didn't really have much contact with my Dad or his new family before this).

I wasn't kicked out for any particular reason, other than my mother isn't the nicest person in the world, an argument broke out over something pathetic, she then ended the argument with "pack your things and get out of my house", well I did something that shocked her, I didn't put up a fight to stay, I just went and packed my things, and she didn't like that. She shouted me back downstairs to tell me that I couldn't pack any of my things, and I wasn't allowed to leave with anything she bought or paid for, essentially wanting me to leave naked, luckily I had clothing that other family members had bought me, so I rang my Dad and left.

We haven't spoken since, other than an E-mail conversation, where she was just as horrible, she basically wants nothing to do with me.

So that's the story of how my depression started. I tried quite a few anti-depressants, swapping and changing to find something that works, nothing did, so I give up. I decided life was what I made it, if I wanted to beat it I had to have fun, how wrong was I!?! I lived my life staying away from home, and drinking a lot, doing things I am not proud of, to try and numb out the pain of my depression, it never worked in the long run, my problems were still there when I was on my own, even in a crowded room I could feel alone!

 

Well here I am, 8 years later, aged 24 (25 next month), and due to ignoring it, and not trying to find the right medication or help, my mental health has severely deteriorated. I finally went back to the doctors, and have been referred to a mental health outpatients unit where they think I have Bipolar disorder and possible Psychosis, I also have Anxiety which has gotten worse, suffering panic attacks in situations where I wouldn't usually get a panic attack.

That's a part of my mental health story, and I've just shared it with the world potentially.

 

Living with mental health problems, is twice as hard than living without, every day is a constant struggle, sometimes it can be hard to even get up in a morning, never mind getting on with every day jobs. With myself though, I can get on with what needs doing, I can get up in a morning and I always make sure my family has what they need. I push my problems to the back and get on with it, which in turn doesn't help myself, but my family come first to me.

 

As I said at the start, mental health effects everybody differently, whether it be mild, or severe. Most people hide it from the world because it's seen as a weakness, afraid of being laughed at, and bullied. Well it isn't a weakness, it can run in families, or a sign that you have simply been strong for too long, some people can suffer from it without any sort of trigger, everybody is different!

You're not weak, everybody has a breaking point, but the best thing you can do is seek help! I can't stress this enough, if any of you feel there is something wrong, asking for help is the strongest thing you can do! Even if you just tell a friend or family member. 15% of people diagnosed with depression commit suicide, now it may not seem like a big number, but it is if you think how many people get diagnosed with depression each year. People commit suicide because they feel alone, nobody to turn to, well that is not the case, there is plenty of help out there if you just ask for it.

 

There is a link here to the NHS 'Mood Zone' that has lots of help and advice to different mental health issues.

 

If any one feels suicidal, please contact the Samaritans, their UK website is here. The Samaritans are a group of volunteers that you can talk to 24 hours a day 365 days a year, you don't have to be suicidal to talk to them either, but they are there to listen and be there for you and everything is confidential.

I'm not quite sure about other organisations in different countries but please look them up in your area if you are feeling suicidal or need somebody to talk to!

 

If anybody would like to chat I am more than willing to listen, just drop me a message via my contact form and I will respond :)

 

I know I'm not the best at putting things like this into words, but I hope somebody out there read what I had to say, and hopefully I've helped someone, no matter how little.

 

Please remember your not alone.

 

 

LoveTaraBabii♡